Breakfast for Your Soul

Day 212: Bar Mitzvahs and Bat Mitzvahs, and the Need for a New Kind of Hero

All of my friends growing up were Jewish. Some say that makes me sheltered, I say it gave my middle school years a really epic social life.

I was never one of those kids who believed that the purpose of a bar or bat mitzvah was to celebrate turning 12 or 13 (if I wanted a big birthday party, I would have treated it like a big birthday party), I always believed the religious and spiritual aspects were most important and the celebration later on was just added fun.

I went to a lot of cool parties: I saw sports mascots show up at parties, a girl I knew rode in on an elephant, one of my cousins had his party in a planetarium. All very cool. I had a party too, it wasn't quite as hyped up as any of those, it was a simple party held after Shabbas at my synagogue with a DJ and a photo booth and food.

While those parties all had wow factors, I always kind of wondered what the point was. Yes it was cool, yes we all had fun, but did we put more effort into planning the parties or studying for our special days? Shouldn't we change the focus back to religion and spirituality and make our celebrations more humble?

Day 213: Start Your Day with Gratitude

One of the things I've worked on really hard for the past year has been remembering to say the Shema at night and Modeh Ani in the morning. I even had an app send me a text every evening and morning reminding me to say them.

Modeh Ani is supposed to be the first thing we recite in the morning, we should wake up like lions and firstly express joy and gratitude. Sounds like a good way to start the day, like breakfast for your soul.

This summer, I made a special effort to say Modeh Ani as I drove to work. Most of the time it wasn't the first words I said aloud, but it gave me a special time to say it every day and start my day in the right mindset.

An additional challenge is presented in today's section: to not say Modeh Ani without focus. It shouldn't be robotic. As we say it, we should be thinking of at least one thing we are thankful for, one reason we are happy to be alive, and filled with awe, reverence, and gratitude both for God and for life itself.

Day 214: If You Have a Tendency to Complain About Others

Last night, my family's flight was delayed, the airline was unhelpful, the plane changed 4 times and the gate too. By the time we left the airport, it was 3 a.m. Needless to say, nobody was happy. It's easy to complain when something like that happens.

Earlier this year, I wanted a mocha frappuccino from my dining hall. Like usual, I ordered it with soy milk (Ashkenazi Jews and the curse of lactose intolerance) but to my dismay, they told me they weren't allowed to substitute soy milk. Needless to say, I wasn't happy. It's easy to complain when something like that happens (and I did, but fairly politely in my opinion).

It's easy to let our complaints get out of hand: someone cut you off in traffic, your meal arrived cold, your boss gave you more work. But so many good things happen each day that it seems ridiculous to focus on the negatives: the sunrise or sunset was especially beautiful, the person who made your coffee was exceptionally friendly, you read something that really inspired you. Doesn't it make sense to acknowledge, not only our complaints but also our gratefulness?

Jews are supposed to say a minimum of 100 blessings each day to remind us of the things we are thankful for. These are simple things: the clothing we wear, the ability to properly go to the bathroom and have our bodies function normally, for giving us sight. Let's keep this "attitude of gratitude" alive and well.